Friday, September 28, 2012

Only Friends



My stepfather is a writer and editor. He is also an honest man whose opinion I value.
Each month I email him this column, and each month he emails my columns back to me with suggestions on how to improve the column.
Last month, I sent him what I thought was a brilliant piece of writing on religious doubt. I felt sure that the column would wow him. But, as an honest man — and my friend — he wrote back, “Hunt (everyone in my family calls me by this nickname) — this column was a tough one for me to follow and agree with. Not your best writing.” When I read his remark I thought: “Hmm…I guess the piece wasn't as genius as I imagined.”
Did it sting a little to read his critique?
Yes.
But I’m glad he told me the truth. It goes without saying (but I will, nevertheless, say it) that only a true friend will tell you if your writing stinks, your zipper is down, or that you have blue cheese dressing on your upper lip.
My email conversation with my stepfather reminded me of the French existentialist, Albert Camus, who wrote, “Don’t walk behind me; I may not lead. Don’t walk in front of me; I may not follow. Just walk beside me and be my friend.”
That’s what we all crave, is it not? Don’t we all crave a friend to walk beside us — in the good times and the bad? Don’t we all crave someone who we can relate with and share common interests?
Don’t we all crave a relationship of mutuality and the type of friend-love that allows for honest critique?
Sometimes it’s not easy to have a good friend because sometimes a good friend must tell us what we don’t want to hear. And sometimes what we don’t want to hear is exactly what we do need to hear. As the Jewish wisdom literature of Proverbs reminds us: “An open rebuke is better than hidden love. Wounds from a sincere friend are better than many kisses from an enemy.”
Or, as the Buddha taught: “A good friend who points out mistakes and imperfections is to be respected as if he reveals a secret of hidden treasure.”
A couple of weeks ago I received a Publix advertisement in my mailbox. Contained in this advertisement was a piece of trivia that stated: “People who have a friend within one mile of their home tend to be happier than those who have friends living farther away.”
I don’t know whether or not this is true for all people, but it is true for me. It’s like Aristotle said: “Friendship is a single soul dwelling in two bodies.” The closer you are to your good friend, the closer you are to your own soul.
So, what are you waiting for? Touch base with the other half of your soul. You’ll be glad that you did — even if your friend tells you what you’d rather not hear.

Saturday, September 15, 2012

An Attack On One Religion is an Attack On All Religions



I'm enraged at people I don't even know. 

I've just finished viewing the 14 minute movie trailer for the so-called “Muhammad Movie,” which has many Muslims around the globe enraged by the portray of their founder.

I stand with the many nonviolent Muslim protesters. I, too, am furious. Spitting mad, as the old saying goes. I'm angry at the writer who sold the script, angry at the producer, director, editors, actors, and everyone else who participated in a project that so flagrantly demeans and demonizes the world's third largest religion.

In the New Testament book of Romans, St. Paul says, “In so far as you are concerned, be at peace with all people.” I strive to live by this dictum. But not all people do. 

Some Christians and non-Christians live in ways that build fires of disrespect. I am not surprised that people would make such a movie. Depravity is a human disease. Depravity, like love or laughter, is one of the things humanity shares the world over. But still I am mad at those who created the film. Madder than a hornet. 

Not only does The “Muhammad Movie” intentionally antagonize devout Muslims, but indirectly the movie mocks and denigrates all historic religions. If the writer and producer can create a film that depicts Muhammad the Prophet in a sickly light, so too can the writer and producer create a film that portrays Jesus, the Buddha, or Moses in a pejorative way. An attack on one religion is an attack on all religions.

No religion is above critique. No religion, when viewed microscopically, comes away clean—just as no person the world over, if viewed in a similar light, would come away spotless. The writer and producer of the so-called “Muhammad Movie” included.

It doesn't take a genius to know that our world has become a global community. One large neighborhood. People living in Libya are not so far away. With the advent of social media, people who live 7,000 miles away may as well live right next door. What kind of people would intentionally injure their neighbor? What kind of people consciously set out to hurt a person who lives next door to them?